Sep 04 1996
Just color hanks unimpressed: star refuses role as chief exec
Arkansas Democrat-Gazette (Little Rock, AR)
September 04, 1996, Wednesday
just color hanks unimpressed: star refuses role as chief exec
BYLINE: ERIC E. HARRISON, Democrat-Gazette Critic at Large
SECTION: STYLE; Pg. 3F
LENGTH: 660 words
If elected, I will not serve: Tom Hanks has turned down the lead role in “Primary Colors,” the film version of the best seller written anonymously by Newsweek’s Joe Klein. Director Mike Nichols hoped to cast Hanks as the Clinton-esque candidate and Emma Thompson as his hard-charging wife. But the actor, re-portedly a chum of the president’s, has bolted. No word yet on a second choice.
School daze: Comedian Dennis Miller on education: “Our culture has gon e from the ‘G.E. College Bowl’ to the guy on ‘Wheel of Fortune’ who asks, ‘Is there an F, as in Pharaoh?’ ”
Speaking of game shows, it must be really hard to play “Wheel of Fortune” in Poland (and no, this is not a Polish joke, so simmer down). Imagine: “I’d like to buy a vowel, Pat.” “Sorry,” Pat replies, “there aren’t any.”
Culture vulture: In the September issue of GQ, a piece by Joe Queenan called “How Bad Can It Be?” delineates the different levels of American popular cul-ture. Queenan decides to go outside his “elite, effete” tastes, which include Elvis Costello, Igor Stravinsky, Tom McGuane and Henry James, and plunges into “the culture of the masses,” which includes Michael Bolton, “Cats,” Dean Koontz and the movies of Chris Farley and Adam Sandler: “Until I saw ‘Billy Madison’ and ‘Tommy Boy,’ I’d always thought that the three scariest words in the English language were ’starring Dan Aykroyd.’ ” Queenan also describes John Tesh’s re-cent CD as sounding “so much like dentist’s-office music that I inexplicably found myself flossing in the middle of the day.” That’s pretty bad.
No sex, please, we’re British: In Britain, 60 percent of the women sur veyed in an opinion poll said they would rather go out to a restaurant for dinner than stay home and have sex. Here’s a little tip, folks: Even if you’re British, it’s possible to do both. And on the same night, too.
Not just no, but … Remember the May offer of Hal Lipset and five oth er private detectives to investigate O.J. Simpson’s claims that the murderers of his late wife were in San Francisco?
About a week after the offer was made, Lipset says, he received a fax from Simpson’s investigator, Zvonko “Bill” Pavelic, too strongly worded for a gentle-man to read aloud.
“He could have just said he discussed this with his client and thanks, but no thanks, but his letter was very mean,” Lipset notes.
P.S.: Philip Vannatter and Tom Lange, lead detectives in the Simpson case, have signed with Pocket Books to write their version of the whole saga.
Tie food: Venture Initiative of Dallas offers Tie Cuisine, a selection of 100 silk ties in patterns that mimic common food stains.
“For years, men everywhere have struggled with the universal fashion problem: spillage,” says the brochure. Patterns on the ties match the “drops that spot their best tie just as they’re about to make a remarkable point during a meal.”
The ties, $ 15, are available in Chinese Food, Wine, Club Sandwich, Buffalo Wings, Cordials, Salad and Dessert. Previous offerings have included Tacos and Quesadillas, Pasta, Pizza, Barbecue Ribs and Soup du Jour. Perfect for folks like us, who only wear ties to keep food off our shirts.
Son of a you-know-what: Rottweilers are the most popular dogs in Russi a.
“It’s the Mafia’s favorite breed,” Anatoly Glebov says, by way of an adver-tisement for his $ 350 puppies. “She’s a killing machine, and she’ll fight to the end. A terrifying dog. She’ll guard your house, your car, your family. And she’s very good with children.”
Short stuff: Carol Burnett will play Jamie’s (Helen Hunt) mom in an episo de of NBC’s “Mad About You,” to be taped this month for broadcast later in the sea-son … Diane Sawyer has scored a coup: She’ll interview the Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson, on Nov. 13; it’ll be Fergie’s first TV chat since leaving the royal family.
Partially compiled from Democrat-Gazette wire services.
LOAD-DATE: September 05, 1996
LANGUAGE: ENGLISH